Signs of a Psychotic
by Lil-PrincessK
Summary: ~*COMPLETE*~ (one shot) S/D semi-romance. What would Serena be like if everything she saw reminded her of some memory of her Ex, Darien, transforming her into a bawling psycho?
1. ORIGINAL

IMPORTANT: ~*This has been revised (see next chapter) so really, it would be sort of a waste to read this older version, unless you want to compare and contrast the two.*~  
  
Ok, this is a response to a challenge from a group I participate in on Yahoo. Just a quick one-shot thing! The criteria are: 1. A sign that says, "Lost Kitty" 2. A water fountain 3. Someone says, "I wish you hadn't done that." 4. The title of the story begins with the letter S. 5. At least one scene takes place at grocery store. For extra challenge, we are to make it exactly 1000 words. I tried for that, but went over. Oh well, I tried!  
  
Summary: What would Serena be like if everything she saw reminded her of some memory of her Ex, Darien, transforming her into a bawling psycho? Rating: G; Genre: Humor.  
  
"Signs of a Psychotic"  
  
Serena was walking down the street, minding her own business. She joined up with her friend Raye and they walked to the nearby arcade. Just as the two were approaching the sliding doors, Serena stopped, stiff as a board.  
  
Raye sighed, knowing what was coming.  
  
"WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DARIEN USED TO WEAR THAT SAME PAIR OF SHOES THAT THE MAN OVER THERE IS!!!!!!!!!" People on both sides of the street stopped to look at the girl, now on her knees, crying her heart out, and to look at the older man whose shoes had caused the sudden outburst. He was sheepishly trying to scoot away, unseen.  
  
Raye helplessly patter her back. "Serena, look at the bright side. Darien's were brand new, and those are a little scuffed up." Serena almost immediately looked up.  
  
"Really, Raye?" She jumped back up, back to normal again. Raye thought over this and past 'attacks' Serena had started having since Darien had broken up with her three days ago. She would see something, reminding her of something related to Darien. She would pick the oddest things that no one would even connect to him, but somehow, she did.  
  
The girls walked into the arcade, which most people would think would set off another tantrum, but for God knows why, didn't, and ordered a milkshake.  
  
Andrew, a close friend and the cashier at the local hang out nodded and asked, "Do you want chocolate or strawberry?"  
  
Silence.  
  
The girl's lip began to tremble, and all of the customers covered their ears in response.  
  
"DARIEN USED TO BUY ME CHOCOLATES FROM THE CANDY STORE!" She sniffed as Raye decided for her. "She'll have the strawberry, Andy. Serena, just get the other one. Simple as that."  
  
After eating, Raye suggested that they go to the local grocery store to pick up some ice cream to make her feel better and to get a few other snacks for the meeting later on that night.  
  
As they passed a woman giving out free samples, the lady thrust out a small spoon-full of pasta sauce, shoving it right under Serena's nose. "Have a taste of the original Ragu!" she said pleasantly. Again, Serena stood stock still.  
  
"Oh boy, I wish you hadn't done that."  
  
"DARIEN USED TO MAKE ME SPAGETTI THAT SMELLED JUST LIKE THAT! HE WAS SUCH A GOOD COOK WHEN IT CAME TO PASTA!" She sniffled a bit while Raye tried to apologize for her friend's outburst, while dragging her quickly away with their purchases.  
  
Later on, on the way to Ray's temple for their meeting, Lita was walking with Serena down a busy street. Lita stopped, and a few paces later, Serena turned to see what had attracted her attention. "What are you looking at, Lita?"  
  
The tall girl pulled a sheet of paper off of the lamp post, showing it to her. It was a flyer that had a picture of a black and white cat on it with the caption "Lost Kitty" and a phone number. "Looks like my cousin lost her cat again."  
  
~Sniff Sniff. . . ~  
  
"DARIEN HAD A COUSIN WHO HAD A FRIEND WHO HAD A DOG THAT LIKED TO CHASE A CAT THAT LOOKED LIKE THAT!" Lita sweat-dropped, hastily crumpling up the paper and pulling the whimpering blonde to sit on a bench in a park. From her consistent crying, Serena had developed the hiccups.  
  
"Lets go find a water fountain to get rid of these, ok? Then we can go to the temple and you can rest for a while," Lita insisted. Serena nodded.  
  
When they found a nearby fountain, Serena drank a few gulps and hung her head upside down, swallowing it. After a few tries, the hiccups were gone and the pair headed on their merry way to their friend's house.  
  
After the hiccup episode, Lita and Serena joined Amy and Mina, both on their way to Raye's as well. "How is she doing?" whispered a concerned Amy behind Serena's back.  
  
"Well, she outbursts at things that remind her of Darien. . ." but Mina was cut off my a howl.  
  
"DON'T SAY THAT NAME IN MY PRESENCE!" Serena yelled. "Never, ever, EVER again, please?" she begged. The three shrugged helplessly and they continued along to the Cherry Hill Temple.  
  
Raye was waiting for them on the front steps with an agitated look on her face, tapping her foot impatiently, arms crossed. "And WHERE have you four been? HMMM???" Amy felt the need to take her aside to explain Serena's recent troubles, for the priestess had been away on a trip for the past week. Her arrival home was the occasion of celebration for their meeting/sleep over.  
  
"Raye, uh, I don't know how to say this, and please, don't kill him, but Serena has informed us that Darien," and she whispered the name VERY quietly, "has broken up with her. . ." Before Raye could start yelling about death threats, Lita jumped from around the corner and clamped her mouth shut.  
  
"Shhh! If Serena is reminded, she starts bawling uncontrollably! It isn't a pretty sight, either! Just outright starts screaming about how even CHIPMUNKS remind her of him, because 'when he stuff his mouth when he's eating too fast, his face gets all cute and puffy' " Lita mimicked.  
  
Finally under control, Raye queried, "When and how did THIS happen?!"  
  
Lita answered solemnly, "Well, three days ago, Serena said. She said he hadn't called her for over a week and has been avoiding her. They hadn't even bumped turning corners like usual."  
  
"Well, Darien called about 30 minutes ago saying that he was going to be late to the meeting. How dare he even show his mangy face around here after that! Well, I guess we could still use his help in fighting the evil in Tokyo. . . we could let him take most of the hits for us! And they can take him hostage, thinking we will try to save him!" Her brilliant plans for Darien-domination were cut short, however, by Serena and Mina both yelling for Lita to come and prepare food for them. Lita sweat-dropped and they all went inside.  
  
After an hour of fun, gossip, and of course scout duty (obviously suggested by Amy. . .), they heard the door open, signaling that someone had entered the temple. "Hey, Grandpa, is that you?" Ray questioned the new arrival.  
  
Serena, on the other hand, sat straight up. Her back already facing the entrance. "I smell. . . roses." This time, instead of screaming and pouring tears out like a faucet, a single tear trickled out of her right eye, down her cheek, and onto her lips. The salty taste brought her back to her senses just as the visitor walked into sight. She let out a barely audible whispered word. "Darien."  
  
Raye and Lita were facing him as he walked in, an unknowing smile on his face. "Hey guys, sorry I was late, but my train. . ." Darien was cut off by the look of barely controlled rage in the Martian's eyes, a nearly identical look of anger in the brunette's. "Uh, what's up? New enemy?" he was so hopeful that the anger wasn't directed at him, but he didn't believe that. 'I wonder what I did NOW. . .' he thought.  
  
He saw Serena slowly turn to look at him with large, hurt eyes. Silently crying eyes. He quickly knelt down to hold her small face in his hands. "Sere, what's the matter?" She just whipped her head away from his touch, leaving him more confused. He looked to the others for help. "Tell me what happened. NOW!"  
  
Mina looked at him sadly, for she thought their love would never end. It didn't look like it had, either. 'I wonder what made him do it." She thought.  
  
Lita rolled her eyes dramatically. "As if you don't know," was all she said. 'I'm gonna POUND that guy if I get a chance. . .'  
  
Raye stared at him, unblinking. "How dare you even come here and ask that question, you cold hearted baka [if you choose, insert favorite bad word here ^_^]! After so harshly breaking up with poor Serena, you have the guts to walk into MY territory?! You are SO asking for it." Raye was thinking of strange tortures Grandpa had told her of. 'Lets see. . . the pit of sharp prongs should do nicely.'  
  
Amy just looked from Raye to Lita to Darien with worry, hoping that she wouldn't have a murder on her hands. 'Oh boy, he better run now or he's a goner.'  
  
But instead of running, he just looked at Raye with a very bewildered face. "Break up with her? Where would you get a crazy idea like that?!" He looked back at Serena, grasping her hand. "I would never do that to you. What gave you the idea?"  
  
She turned back to him, unbelieving. "You haven't called me in over a week and a half and you've been avoiding me! That's what gave me the idea!"  
  
He smiled at the irony in it all, barely being able to hold in laughter. To this, Raye leaped up. "You think hurting her is FUNNY?!?! I'll show you FUNNY!!!" He blocked her punches softly.  
  
"No! Never! Serena," he turned to her, "I was away a few hours away from here all week. It was a company thing and I couldn't contact anyone here because of a secrecy thing. I'm sorry you got the wrong idea. I was going to make it up to you by taking you to Disneyland!"  
  
She perked up. "Really? You were? You didn't find an anorexic American underwear model to date you?!" Darien shook his head vigorously. "No way!"  
  
The small blonde leaped up and tackled him in a gigantic bear-hug. The couple went to Disneyland, saw Mickey Mouse, and lived happily ever after! Until he broke up with her again over the dream thing! [AN: Shameless plug. . . Read I Can Cry If I Want To! It's not finished yet (it is very close), but it's about the dream breakup thing! ^_^]  
  
A/n: Ok, the story is 1,688 words. Not the 1,000 word challenge, but hey, I can only do so much condensing! 


	2. REVISED VERSION not so choppy

Ok, this is a response to a challenge from a group I participate in on Yahoo. Just a quick one-shot thing! And yes, I finally revised it! (though I don't think I did a good job about it. . . The criteria are: 1. A sign that says, "Lost Kitty" 2. A water fountain 3. Someone says, "I wish you hadn't done that." 4. The title of the story begins with the letter S. 5. At least one scene takes place at grocery store. For extra challenge, we are to make it exactly 1000 words. I tried for that, but went over. Oh well, I tried!  
  
Summary: What would Serena be like if everything she saw reminded her of some memory of her Ex, Darien, transforming her into a bawling psycho? Rating: G; Genre: Humor.  
  
"Signs of a Psychotic"  
  
Serena White was walking down the street one beautiful Saturday afternoon, minding her own business. She joined up with her friend Mina and they began walking to the nearby arcade, ready to fight the evils of the universe on the new Sailor V game.  
  
"So, how are things with Jake?" Serena asked good-naturedly. He was a guy that Mina had liked for the past 2 months who hadn't yet asked for her phone number.  
  
"Oh, nothing much. He still hasn't asked me out, but I'm almost positive he wants to. I just have to push him a little more."  
  
Just as the two were approaching the sliding doors, Serena stopped, stiff as a board. Her breathing seemed to stop, and she looked as if she had seen a ghost.  
  
Mina sighed, knowing what was coming.  
  
"WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DARIEN USED TO WEAR THAT SAME PAIR OF SHOES THAT THE MAN OVER THERE IS!!!!!!!!!" People on both sides of the street stopped to look at the girl, now on her knees, crying her heart out, and to look at the older man whose shoes had caused the sudden outburst. He was sheepishly trying to scoot away, unseen. Mina gave him an apologetic look and turned to her friend now flooding the sidewalk with her tears.  
  
Mina helplessly patted her back. "Serena, look at the bright side. Darien's were brand new, and those are a little scuffed up." Serena almost immediately looked up.  
  
"Really, Mina?" She jumped back up, back to normal again. Mina thought over this and past 'attacks' Serena had started having since Darien had broken up with her three days ago. She would see something, reminding her of something related to Darien. She would pick the oddest things that no one would even connect to him, but somehow, she did. But heaven forbid she sees something that was totally Darien-like, she wouldn't even think twice about it.  
  
The girls walked into the arcade, which most people would think would set off another tantrum, but for God knows why, didn't, and ordered a milkshake.  
  
Andrew, a close friend and the cashier at the local hang out nodded and asked, "Do you want chocolate or strawberry?"  
  
Silence.  
  
The girl's lip began to tremble violently, and all of the customers covered their ears in response. Someone mumbled under their breath, "Oh, God, what is it THIS time. . ."  
  
"DARIEN USED TO BUY ME CHOCOLATES FROM THE CANDY STORE!" She sniffed as Mina decided for her. "She'll have the strawberry, Andy. Serena, just get the other one. Simple as that."  
  
Serena whimpered for a bit more and was back to normal by the time the shake was set before her. Mina ordered some fries and they chatted amiably about different things.  
  
After eating, Mina suggested that they go to the local grocery store to pick up some ice cream to make her feel better and to get a few other snacks for the meeting later on that night.  
  
"Raye has specially requested a jumbo bag of Reisens, and Amy wanted some boiled peanuts. We might as well grab you something, too."  
  
As they passed a woman giving out free samples, the lady thrust out a small spoon-full of pasta sauce, shoving it right under Serena's nose. "Have a taste of the original Ragu!" she said pleasantly. Again, Serena stood stock still as if she had just been shot.  
  
"Oh boy, I wish you hadn't done that."  
  
"DARIEN USED TO MAKE ME SPAGETTI THAT SMELLED JUST LIKE THAT! HE WAS SUCH A GOOD COOK WHEN IT CAME TO PASTA!" She sniffled a bit while Mina tried to apologize for her friend's outburst, while dragging her quickly away with their purchases.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Serena was waiting at her street corner for Lita. They were going to start walking to Raye's and run into Mina and Amy on the way, getting there together. They were walking down a busy street and discussing the different typed of punched Lita was capable of. Lita decided, however, to change the subject for a minute.  
  
"Hey, so how have you been, Sere? I hope you've finally decided to get over, well, you know."  
  
Serena just shrugged in response. Lita stopped, and a few paces later, Serena turned to see what had attracted her attention. "What are you looking at, Lita?"  
  
The tall girl pulled a sheet of paper off of the lamp post, showing it to her. It was a flyer that had a picture of a black and white cat on it with the caption "Lost Kitty" and a phone number. "Looks like my cousin lost her cat again."  
  
~Sniff Sniff. . . ~  
  
"DARIEN HAD A COUSIN WHO HAD A FRIEND WHO HAD A DOG THAT LIKED TO CHASE A CAT THAT LOOKED LIKE THAT!" Lita sweat-dropped, hastily crumpling up the paper and pulling the whimpering blonde to sit on a bench in a park. From her consistent crying, Serena had developed the hiccups.  
  
"I guess not," she almost silently said to herself. "Lets go find a water fountain to get rid of these, ok? Then we can go to the temple and you can rest for a while," Lita insisted. Serena nodded.  
  
When they found a nearby fountain, Serena drank a few gulps and hung her head upside down, swallowing it. After a few tries, the hiccups were gone and the pair headed on their merry way to their friend's house.  
  
After the hiccup episode, Lita and Serena joined Amy and Mina, both on their way to Raye's as well. "How is she doing?" whispered a concerned Amy behind Serena's back.  
  
"Well, she outbursts at things that remind her of Darien. . ." but Mina was cut off my a howl.  
  
"DON'T SAY THAT NAME IN MY PRESENCE!" Serena yelled. "Never, ever, EVER again, please?" she begged. The three shrugged helplessly and they continued along to the Cherry Hill Temple.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Always late. I bet they were dilly dallying again, as usual. Probably looking at guys. . ." Grumble, grumble, grumble.  
  
Raye was waiting for them on the front steps with an agitated look on her face, tapping her foot impatiently, arms crossed. "And WHERE have you four been? HMMM???" she nearly yelled in a tight voice as the four girls were seen walking up the walkway.  
  
Amy felt the need to take her aside to explain Serena's recent troubles, for the priestess had been away on a trip for the past week. Her arrival home was the occasion of celebration for their meeting/sleep over.  
  
"Raye, uh, I don't know how to say this, and please, don't kill him, but Serena has informed us that Darien," and she whispered the name VERY quietly, "has broken up with her. . ." Before Raye could start yelling about death threats, Lita jumped from around the corner and clamped her mouth shut.  
  
"Shhh! If Serena is reminded, she starts bawling uncontrollably! It isn't a pretty sight, either! Just outright starts screaming about how even CHIPMUNKS remind her of him, because 'when he stuff his mouth when he's eating too fast, his face gets all cute and puffy' " Lita mimicked.  
  
Finally under control, Raye queried, "When and how did THIS happen?!"  
  
Lita answered solemnly, "Well, three days ago, Serena said. She said he hadn't called her for over a week and has been avoiding her. They hadn't even bumped turning corners like usual."  
  
"Well, Darien called about 30 minutes ago saying that he was going to be late to the meeting. How dare he even show his mangy face around here after that! Well, I guess we could still use his help in fighting the evil in Tokyo. . . we could let him take most of the hits for us! And they can take him hostage, thinking we will try to save him!" Her brilliant plans for Darien-domination were cut short, however, by Serena and Mina both yelling for Lita to come and prepare food for them. Lita sweat-dropped and they all went inside.  
  
After an hour of fun, gossip, and of course scout duty (obviously suggested by Amy. . .), they heard the door open, signaling that someone had entered the temple. "Hey, Grandpa, is that you?" Ray questioned the new arrival.  
  
Serena, on the other hand, sat straight up. Her back already facing the entrance. "I smell. . . roses." This time, instead of screaming and pouring tears out like a faucet, a single tear trickled out of her right eye, down her cheek, and onto her lips. The salty taste brought her back to her senses just as the visitor walked into sight. She let out a barely audible whispered word. "Darien."  
  
Raye and Lita were facing him as he walked in, an unknowing smile on his face. "Hey guys, sorry I was late, but my train. . ." Darien was cut off by the look of barely controlled rage in the Martian's eyes, a nearly identical look of anger in the brunette's. "Uh, what's up? New enemy?" he was so hopeful that the anger wasn't directed at him, but he didn't believe that. 'I wonder what I did NOW. . .' he thought.  
  
He saw Serena slowly turn to look at him with large, hurt eyes. Silently crying eyes. He quickly knelt down to hold her small face in his hands. "Sere, what's the matter?" She just whipped her head away from his touch, leaving him more confused. He looked to the others for help. "Tell me what happened. NOW!"  
  
Mina looked at him sadly, for she thought their love would never end. It didn't look like it had, either. 'I wonder what made him do it." She thought.  
  
Lita rolled her eyes dramatically. "As if you don't know," was all she said. 'I'm gonna POUND that guy if I get a chance. . .'  
  
Raye stared at him, unblinking. "How dare you even come here and ask that question, you cold hearted baka [if you choose, insert favorite bad word here ^_^]! After so harshly breaking up with poor Serena, you have the guts to walk into MY territory?! You are SO asking for it." Raye was thinking of strange tortures Grandpa had told her of. 'Lets see. . . the pit of sharp prongs should do nicely.'  
  
Amy just looked from Raye to Lita to Darien with worry, hoping that she wouldn't have a murder on her hands. 'Oh boy, he better run now or he's a goner.'  
  
But instead of running, he just looked at Raye with a very bewildered face. "Break up with her? Where would you get a crazy idea like that?!" He looked back at Serena, grasping her hand. "I would never do that to you. What gave you the idea?"  
  
She turned back to him, unbelieving. "You haven't called me in over a week and a half and you've been avoiding me! That's what gave me the idea!"  
  
He smiled at the irony in it all, barely being able to hold in laughter. To this, Raye leaped up. "You think hurting her is FUNNY?!?! I'll show you FUNNY!!!" He blocked her punches softly.  
  
"No! Never! Serena," he turned to her, "I was a few hours away from here all week. It was a company thing and I couldn't contact anyone here because of a secrecy thing. I'm sorry you got the wrong idea. I was going to make it up to you by taking you to Disneyland!"  
  
She perked up. "Really? You were? You didn't find an anorexic American underwear model to date you?!" Darien shook his head vigorously. "No way!"  
  
The small blonde leaped up and tackled him in a gigantic bear-hug. The couple went to Disneyland, saw Mickey Mouse, and lived happily ever after! Until he broke up with her again over the dream thing! [AN: Shameless plug. . . Read I Can Cry If I Want To! It's about the dream breakup thing! ^_^]  
  
A/n: Ok, after re-reading and revising some things, I realized that I really needed to. A major mistake was that Serena and Raye (originally) went to the arcade, etc. But later on, I wrote that she had been away for a while and she had just gotten back, and the girls had to explain to her why Serena was all crazy-like. I fixed it, so now Mina is in her place for that scene. 


End file.
